'I just can't make it by myself' --Tom Waits turns 65 and thank god he's still here.

'I just can't make it by myself...' 

It is a very hard call, and I certainly don't stand by it. But for what it is worth, I think Tom Waits' "Shore Leave" is my favourite Tom Waits song. Or, put another way, it is my favourite song.

A vivid tale of a lonely sailor on shore leave in Hong Kong is transformed into something almost frightening in its heartfelt despair. The sailor's declaration that "I just can't make it by myself, I just love you so..." is how I sometimes feel, in my more fanciful (ie: drunk) moments, about the veteran American songwriter who turns 65 today (well OK, that is yesterday here in Sydney where I write this, but it is still before midnight on December 7 in California where Waits resides). 

Tom Waits was inducted into the Rock'N'Roll Hall of Fame in 2011 by Neil Young in a move Waits described as "very encouraging".

In his more than 40 years in the music business, Tom Waits has had a huge impact  -- from his songs that YouTube mash-ups prove could easily have been sung by the Cookie Monster, to inspiring disturbingly accurate parodies like Tom Waits sings Christmas songs to being immortalised on the Internet via the Nyan Waits. 

Waits' turning 65 really makes you think -- mostly, it makes me think: "Oh for FUCK'S SAKE you GODDAMN  BASTARD! You are NOW FUCKING 65!!! TIME IS RUNNING OUT! TOUR AUSTRALIA! FOR GOD'S SAKE JUST COME AND TOUR AGAIN BEFORE YOU'RE TOO DECREPIT AND/OR TOO DEAD YOU ARSEHOLE!!! FUCK!!!"

We are probably lucky we even have the chance, however slim, that he might come back here for the first time since 1979. After all, this was a man who spent the 70s seemingly trying to drink himself to death in a bid to inspire the ultimate barfly song.

By the end of the 70s, Waits was in a bad way -- so bad he said he looked in the mirror one day and saw Billy Joel.

He was saved by the women he married, Kathleen Brennan. But this is not some patronising "woman saves man with her love and became his 'muse'" bullshit story where the woman only exists to further the leading man's narrative.

Brennan did not just help inspire a totally new direction for Waits, starting with 1983s Swordfishtrombone, she has been his creative partner, co-writing most songs ever since. On the nature of their songwriting partnership, Waits has variously offered such insights as "You wash, I'll dry" or "I'll hold the nail, you swing the hammer". 

One example Waits gave of one of Brennan's lines is one of the finest in any Tom Waits song -- "She's a diamond who wants to stay coal" from "Black Market Baby". At first, Waits thought she said "cold".

Essentially, from the 1980s on, the musical entity known to the world as "Tom Waits" has been a more-or-less entirely Waits/Brennan collaboration.

But we can also appreciate the fact that, had he never met Brennan, by his own admission, Waits probably would not be alive right now and tormenting Australian fans with his steadfast refusal to tour here, while making infuriating comments on the topic when pressed about it, like when he told Triple J in 2011 that, while he had no plans to tour, "Life is long, I'm sure it will happen."

Yeah, life is long, Tom, but it is not fucking infinite.




'We're all gonna be just dirt in the ground...' That's right Tom. What you just said. You might want to think of your own words in relation to your long-suffering and fucking desperate Australian fans.


I am obviously a big fan of Tom Waits. His poetic tales of ordinary people staggering through a hellish world frequently make me cry -- especially, but not only, if I've drunk reasonable quantities of beer and/or whiskey.

Others say Waits makes them cry too ... but for different reasons. Not everyone shares my... well obsession is really the only word. His (in)famously ultra-gravelly voice -- as well as his often eccentric sound and persona -- tend to divide opinion between obsessives and large chunks of the rest of humanity.

But whatever. Waits' music is theatrical and sometimes cinematic. It creates an atmosphere and mood in which to tell a story and evoke certain emotions.

And no two people like the exact same films or plays or books. At the end of the day, I just don't give fuck. And through four decades or recording and performing music, Waits has never given much indication he does either.

But rather than keep adding to the many, many words I have written already on this blog about Tom Waits, I'll highlight a couple of quotes from other songwriters and performers on the man -- who has inspired much praise and awe from all kinds of performers across many genres.

Former David Lee Roth guitarist Steve Via, best known as a hard rock metal guitarist, describes himself as "an overzealous fan" of Waits. In an interview about his love of Waits last year, he spoke of the first time he ever heard Waits (when he bought 1999's Mule Variations), saying:

I bought the CD, put it in my player, and I tell you, it stopped me dead in my tracks. I was stunned into silence. I just listened to the entire CD, and then I went out and bought everything that he ever did.

On why Waits affects him so, much Vai explained:

He's 100% committed. When you watch him perform, he's fully present; he's in the moment with every single word... What I look for in music is artistry, sincerity, and simplicity and Tom Waits has all of that ... That's what I get from Tom's music, and that's pretty special.

More recently, Ben Nichols, frontman of country band Lucero (I refuse on absolute principle to use that idiotic phrase "alt. country" -- it's just fucking country music) wrote a November 12 piece for American Songwriter on his deep admiration of Tom Waits. He says:

I remember driving from Memphis to Little Rock listening to “Blind Love” from the album Rain Dogs and saying to myself, “That right there is the type of song I’d like to write in this Lucero band.”

Now, that is all well and good but I’m still trying to write a song like “Blind Love.” In the 16 years I’ve been writing songs for Lucero, I am still struggling to achieve what appears to come so naturally to Tom Waits...

Nichols concluded:

I never go very long without listening to some Tom Waits records. And actually, I just realized the best part about writing this essay … it made me want to stop typing, pick up a guitar and try to write a song, cause that’s what listening to Tom Waits makes me want to do.

So here you go, in honour of his 65th birthday, a pretty random selection of Tom Waits songs, just ones that I feel like including tonight -- there are countless ones I could post and I've done various themed Waits' song posts before.

As ever, the songs are helpfully compiled in a nice YouTube playlist. Yar, don't thank me, buy me a beer sometime. Via the paypal donate button on the right side of the blog...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOM WAITS NOW COME AND FUCKING TOUR AUSTRALIA YOU GODDAMN BASTARD!

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'Don't you know there aint no Devil, there's just God when He's drunk...' As well as just generally a great song and a cool performance, that "Devil/God" line is one of my favourite quotes of all time. And it's followed by 'This stuff'll probably kill ya... let's do another line...' Hollywood summed up.





'The smell of blood, the drone of flies, you know what to do when that baby cries... Hoist that rag...' War, via Tom Waits. One of the tracks from 2004's Real Gone inspired by Bush's futile, failed wars on Iraq and Afghanistan.





'Two dollar pistol, but the gun won't shoot. I'm on the corner in the pouring rain...' Sure, other times, I'd go for the full emotional bombast of 'Downtown Train' -- one of the most poetic songs there is about urban alienation. But I've done that before on this blog, and 1985s Rain Dogs has many more tales of the madness of urban life in a major city like New York and this is just one.





'Well my parole officer will be proud of me...' It probably says a lot about me that I tend to lean towards the "heartboken, drunk and filled with melancholy and regret" side of the Tom Waits ledger.  Here is a Waits' track cutting loose a bit.





'And all the news is bad, is there any other kind?' That one line sums up how, on this track from his 2011 album Bad As Me, Waits combines pointed social and political jabs ('It's hard times for some, for others its sweet. Someone makes money when there's blood on the streets') with his more usual territory of heartache ('Well she told me she'd leave me, I ignored all the signs...')





'The piano is firewood, Times Square is a dream... ' Well I guess I couldn't stay away from the 'bitter sweet songs tinged with melancholy and regret' for too long.

'I'm the last leaf. The autumn took the rest, but they won't take me...' Great track, sharing vocals with Keith Richards.... But still... I mean don't forget Tom... I know you sing 'I'll here through eternity, if you want to know how long. If they cut down this tree I'll turn up in a song', but you know... NOT LIVE. You live on forever, or at least until the climate change-induced eco-holocaust destroys us all, in *song*... But NOT LIVE!!! TOUR AUSTRALIA YOU PRICK!!!

Tom Waits' Top 20 Tearjerkers Of All Time

It seems this is the year where the Internet sought to kill the "list" by overuse and severe abuse. This Guardian piece 35 Reasons Why I hate Lists sums it up perfectly.

But the *key* problem with the endless Buzzfeed list obsession of anything and everything... is it is all about the WRONG FUCKING THINGS! "36 Cats Who Are More Bored Than You." "59 Walruses Who Think You Should Get A Life", "The 87 Most Irritating Things About The Internet's Obsession With Listing Things As Though It Is Inherently Amusing."

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, BUZZFEED???

Luckily *Carlo Sands* is here to rectify the problem and provide all humanity with the only list civilisation actually needs: "Tom Waits' Top 20 Tearjerkers Of All Time".

'I want to believe in the mercy of the world again...' Where are all the lists about Tom Waits songs?



Tom Waits has been in the music business more than 40 years now, and, while his music has undergone transformations, if there is one thing Waits knows how to do, it’s churn out a heat-rending tearjerker.

This is often misunderstood. Waits is sometime seen as an eccentric "weird-for-weird's sake" oddball who is near impossible to listen to. Or a highly stylised maudlin drunken lounge singer with a ridiculously over-the-top voice.

But what Tom Waits is, more than anything else, is a brilliant storyteller. He is a man who can fill your heart with hope in one verse, rip it out with the next and then stomp it into the dust to finish. And he can just as easily do it in reverse. He tells stories about what is to be human, to try to actually *live* on this godforsaken hellhole called Planet Earth.

Interviewing author J. T. LeRoy for Vanity Fair in 2001, Waits said: "The world is a hellish place, and bad writing is destroying the quality of our suffering."

Waits goes on: "It cheapens and degrades the human experience, when it should inspire and elevate." Waits does the opposite. Far from cheapening the human experience, he elevates it. And has done so, consistently, over four decades.

'And I call your name, I can't sleep at night...' Waits' elevates the human experience.


The songs on this list are tearjerkers, but not all the tearjerking comes from sad tales of heartache and loss. True, a lot do, but it includes songs like "Jersey Girl" -- Waits' heartfelt song for the woman he would marry (and has collaborated in song writing with ever since). And "Invitation to the Blues" ends on a hopeful note, while "Hold On" is defiant. "Long Way Home" and "I Hope That I Don't Fall In Love With You" could even be described as "sweet".

"New Year's Eve" and "Christmas Card from a Hooker In Minneapolis" are tearjerkers for different reasons -- both are troubled tales of urban decay, the first set against the hope of a New Year coming, the second... well it should be heard.

There is a hell of a lot more to Waits than tearjerkers -- even if Tom Waits would not be Tom Waits without them. But they are worth highlighting in a society drowning in "love songs" mostly featuring empty sentimentality. We seem afraid of genuine emotion in music.

But love and loss is part of our experience. Few capture it -- and tie the experience to the rest of life -- like Waits does. He combines it with a sense of what it is to be beaten down -- but still standing.

This list is far from complete. It is also *not* a list of the *best* Tom Waits songs. It is simply meant to be good examples of a *certain type* of Waits song. Also, much of Waits material from the '80s on was written with Kathleen Brennan (Waits described the song-writing process as "she washes, I dry"). So I have indicated where the notoriously publicity-shy but key creative collaborator was a co-writer.

Here it is (order does not suggest any "ranking"). You can also hear it as a YouTube playlist)

* * *


1) Shore Leave



"...And I wondered how the same moon outside
over this Chinatown fair
could look down on Illinois
and find you there
and you know I love you baby
and I'm so far away from home..."

Waits is a poet and his use of imagery can be devastating. This song from 1983's Swordfishtrombones is a classic example. It introduces the "junkyard percussion" type sound he developed during the '80s, but most of all, his tale of a homesick soldier in Hong Kong is a fine example of how Waits' uses *words*. I chose the album version over Waits' stunning Big Time performance, as its more understated feel is a bit better at drawing out the imagery of the words. But the Big Time performance is nothing short of spine-tingling. Read the lyrics.


2) Alice



"And so a secret kiss brings madness with the bliss." I dare anyone to deny that truth, and if you don't understand it, you've never lived. This is simply one of the most devastating and heartbreakng songs I have ever heard. From 2002's Alice. Co-written with Kathleen Brennan. Read the lyrics.


3) Blue Valentines


"And it takes a lot of whiskey to make these nightmares go away." A fine example of Waits' earlier work, this track from 1978's Blue Valentines is an evocative tale of being haunted by the past. Read the lyrics.


4) Invitation To The Blues



"Mercy mercy, Mr. Percy, there ain't nothing back in Jersey but a broken-down jalopy of a man I left behind..." I kinda find it hard to even talk about this song. From 1976's Small Change, a brilliant booze-soaked album that was my introduction to Tom Waits, the song is a true tearjerker. Killer line after killer line, it ends on a hopeful note. But you gotta take the whole thing in, so play it again and read the lyrics.


5) Jersey Girl



"And I call your name, I can't sleep at night..." This track, from 1980's Heartattack and Vine was writen for Waits' soon-to-be-wife Kathleen Brennan. They are still together and it must be pointed out that Brennan played a huge role in the development of Waits music from this point on, co-writing much of his material. This live version from 1979 shows the emotional power Waits can give this song. Read the lyrics.

6) Downtown Train



"Outside another yellow moon
Punched a hole in the night time, yes
I climb through the window and down the street
Shining like a new dime
The downtown trains are full
With all those Brooklyn girls
They try so hard to break out of their little worlds
You wave your hand and they scatter like crows
They have nothing that will ever capture your heart
They're just thorns without the rose
Be careful of them in the dark
Oh if I was the one
You chose to be your only one
Oh baby can't you hear me now
Will I see you tonight
On a downtown train
Every night it’s just the same
You leave me lonely, now..."

That first verse is pure, heartbreaking poetry. This song from 1985's Rain Dogs features my favourite opening verse of any song I know of. You can also see a great live performance where Waits is accompanied by just a guitar and a double bass. Read the rest of the lyrics.


7) Trampled Rose



"I know this rose like I know my name. The one I gave my love, it was the same..." This song from 2004's Real Gone is the sound of a man defeated by life and love. Co-written with Kathleen Brennan. Read the lyrics.


8) Green Grass



"Lay your head where my heart used to be, hold the Earth above me ..." A beautiful, moving song about death from 2002's Alice. Co-written with Kathleen Brennan. Read the lyrics.


9) Hold On (Live)



"Down by the Riverside motel,
It's 10 below and falling
By a 99 cent store she closed her eyes
And started swaying
But it's so hard to dance that way
When it's cold and there's no music
Well your old hometown is so far away
But, inside your head there's a record
That's playing, a song called Hold On..."

From start to finish, a heartbreaking tale of small-town bigotry, crushed dreams and a determination to just keep on going. This live version, accompanied only by a softly played piano, brings the words to the fore. You can hear the version from 1999's Mule Variations (and see a rare video clip) here. Co-written with Kathleen Brennan. Read the lyrics.


10) Christmas Card from a Hooker In Minneapolis



"Hey Charlie I'm pregnant..." One of Waits' classic opening lines, matched by the song’s closing lines, which I won't quote so as not to spoil the story. You can see a live performance of this track from 1978's Blue Valentines that stuns a sceptical crowd into silent awe. Read the lyrics.


11) Tom Traubert's Blues (Four Sheets To The Wind In Copenhagen)



"And it's a battered old suitcase to a hotel some place, and a wound that will never heal." A long, vivid tale of, in Waits' words, "throwing up on yourself in a foreign country", the classic opening lines set the scene: "Wasted and wounded, it aint what the moon did. I got what I paid for now." You can hear the strings-backed original from 1976s Small Change. Read the lyrics.


12) Innocent When You Dream (Big Time version)



"I gave my love a locket and then I broke her heart..." Sounds like a heartbroken man staggering down an empty street waving a near empty bottle of absinthe while he shouts his woes to the moon. 1987s Frank Wild Years contained two versions of this. Read the lyrics.


13) Hang Down Your Head



"Hush a wild violet, hush a band of gold. Hush you're in a story I heard somebody told..." Just another beautiful but heartbreaking song from the Master of Misery on his classic 1985 Rain Dogs album. Covering Tom Waits is a very hard thing to do, but Lucinda Williams does a great version of this. Co-written with Kathleen Brennan. Read the lyrics


14) Talking At The Same Time



"All the news is bad, is there any other kind?" On this track from 2011's Bad As Me, Waits mixes personal heartbreak in with the widespread pain and suffering caused throughout US society by the Great Recession -- where "we bailed out the billionaires, they got the fruit, we got the rind". Co-written with Kathleen Brennan. Read the lyrics.


15) New Year's Eve



"It felt like four in the morning
What sounded like fire works
Turned out to be just what it was
The stars looked like diamonds
Then came the sirens
And everyone started to cuss"

Just a Tom Waits' New Years Eve... full of desperate people in desperate situations. A tale of being trapped in urban decay, this is a real tearjerker from 2011's Bad as Me. I know a fan of Tom Waits who, the first time he heard this song while driving his truck, began crying. It’s that kinda track. Co-written with Kathleen Brennan. Read the lyrics.


16) All The World Is Green (Live on Letterman)



"Pretend that you owe me nothing, and all the world is green. We can bring back the old days again..." From 2002's Blood Money, a tale of loss and nostalgic longing for a better past. Co-written with Kathleen Brennan. Read the lyrics.


17) Georgia Lee



"Why wasn't God watching?" The emotional power of this song, from 1999's Mule Variations, comes from the fact it is about a true story. Georgia Lee Moses was a 12-year-old girl found murdered in 1997 near where Waits and Brennan live in California.

The case got a lot less attention than the very similar horrific murder involving the 12-year-old Polly Klaas a couple of years earlier -- a fact some put down to Moses being Black and the daughter of a mentally handicapped single mother. Waits and Brennan were determined Georgia Lee Moses would not be forgotten. Co-written with Kathleen Brennan. Read the lyrics.


18) Make It Rain (Live)



"I want to believe in the mercy of the world again..." This slower live version of this bluesy track from 2004's Real Gone brings the tale of betrayal and pain to life. Co-written with Kathleen Brennan. Read the lyrics.


19) Long Way Home



"Well I stumbled in the darkness, I'm lost and alone..." This is a very moving, almost sweet, tale in which the narrator battles the pressures and temptations of life but finds salvation in love. It appeared on 2006's triple album of never-before-released rarities, Orphans.

It is also a great example of Waits' quality as a performer, and the role of his rough voice. Waits' actually gave this song to Norah Jones, who recorded it first. Her version is fine -- there is nothing wrong with it and musically it is pretty indistinguishable from Waits'. But then you listen to Waits sing it, and it breaks your heart. Waits' voice is essential -- it is grounds his songs, it drags them through the dirt. And this makes the emotion feel more real and cuts against cheap sentimentality. Co-written with Kathleen Brennan. Read the lyrics.


20) I Hope That I Don't Fall In Love With You



"...'Cause falling in love just makes me blue." A sweet song from Waits' first album, 1973's Closing Time. Waits was yet to develop his trademark growling vocals, giving a unique feel to this romantic tale of late-night bar life. Read the lyrics.

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Well, the only thing left to say is it was near impossible to chose only 20 great tearjerkers. There are so many more -- Waits' career was spanned four decades and there is not a bad moment in it. I simply tried to give an overview. You gotta a great Waits tearjerker not there? Feel free to add it in the comment section.