tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31231411.post288445604058419310..comments2024-03-06T06:07:36.191+11:00Comments on An alcoholic's guide to modern life: In defence of the gutterCarlo Sandshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12947602891142664168noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31231411.post-79321687552649510682011-04-18T12:29:55.072+10:002011-04-18T12:29:55.072+10:00I thank Conehead for his comments and wish to poin...I thank Conehead for his comments and wish to point out, for those confused, that Cotabato City is in Mindanoa, a southern island in part of the Philippines state. But this state of affairs is somewhat disputed and an interesting aticle on this state of affairs can be found here.:<br /><br />http://www.greenleft.org.au/node/47317<br /><br />Perhaps Conehead could have read of it to familiarise himself with the situation, rather than concerning himself exclusively with the state of its pubs and airport - signficant though these are.<br /><br />This blog does not exist purely for frivolity, its aims at important commentary on social and political affairs of the world.<br /><br />As to "Ben", who has seen fit to involve his lawyers in this matter, all I can say is pubs these days have CCTV footage, should it come to that. Though I am confident that "Ben" is keen to ensure this matter stays well out of any court of law.<br /><br />On "Ben"'s statement on drinking and the circumstances surrounding it, well sure. My piece was not an argument against any of this. <br /><br />Getting locked-up in a holding cell at the SCG before the fucking first bounce at a game between, say, Sydney and Geelong is no doubt one of those life experience's to be aimed for. A certainity for inclusion in the "top ten things to do before you die of liver failure" list of any person with self respect.<br /><br />Of course surroundings have an impact and are far from irrelevent. I mean, there are places such as The Phoenix Hotel in Canberra, that should be actively sought out. Hell, I'd make the trip to Melbourne just to drink jugs at the Stork *if they hadn't torn the fucking place down to build a carpark*.<br /><br />But these are places in which the key point is they facilitate the process of drinking, at which drinking is the key point. And they are not places with any pretension to being out of any gutter. <br /><br />And that is so very rare in this world of stainless-steel-nightmare-inducing, lifeless, bouncer-ridden bars.<br /><br />Yours,<br />Carlo Sands (deceased)Carlo Sandshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12947602891142664168noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31231411.post-19181682227475935902011-04-18T09:39:27.633+10:002011-04-18T09:39:27.633+10:00As the legal representative for "ben"- w...As the legal representative for "ben"- we would like to advise denies any and all knowledge of any supposed goon inspired incidents in or around newtown/enmore.<br /><br />Further, my client would like to make the following statement:- "Cotabato City sounds like exactly the kind of place for such activities. The proliferation of high powered firearms would surely just add a level of risk and adventure that is sorely lacking in western societies."<br /><br />"but that matter aside, while i do agree with the general thrust of the above piece, that above all else, drinking is all that really matters, and that the biggest curse on a good drink is the modern curse of wankery, which should be avoided as much as one can, the setting in which one indulges can have quite significant input into the overall quality of the evening."<br /><br />"as much as i do love the local, can that really compare to a redfern underwear party? Or to stolen scotch on top of the biggest building in rotterdam? or absinthe in the 'ladies college' at a prestigious school? Or smuggling beer to a troop of girl guides in paris? Or goon in the holding cells of the SCG? Or pissing from balconies drinking sangria in spain? or ale on rollerblades in brussels? or midnight wine at the bathers beach in freo on a tuesday? i could continue, but i think i have made my point sufficiently clear"<br /><br />"It is about drinking, and it think it would be foolish to put one drinkery fundamentally above another, but in the course of an evening where you go certainly makes an impact on the story one can tell."<br /><br />All further inquiries can be forwarded to our offices, which you can find at the bottom of the bottle.Gutter & Sons Attorneys of Lawnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31231411.post-56812342058257214632011-04-16T13:09:18.121+10:002011-04-16T13:09:18.121+10:00That last paragraph was meant to read: Seriously, ...<em><strong>That last paragraph was meant to read:</strong></em> Seriously, if you're white European looking you could pull out a bag of smack and shoot up in the customs hall & the customs & security people wouldn't notice because they're too busy hassling all the darker skinned people or noticing that a respectable-looking grandmother is wearing a headscarfe.Conehead the Barbituratenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31231411.post-58801995268362186102011-04-16T13:04:00.410+10:002011-04-16T13:04:00.410+10:00Can't imagine who the person you call "Be...Can't imagine who the person you call "Ben" is what he'd be doing drinking goon in the Newtown/Enmore area but that kind of sounds like fun. But then again, anything sounds like fun at the moment as I've spent the last week & half sick as a dog in the most boring town in Europe (which has an uncanny resemblence to Canberra, but without the Phoenix).<br /><br />Haven't been to a pub for a couple of weeks. The last pub I was in was fun. The bouncer had an armalite. I was told it was a "better class of joint" than others in Cotabato City which means fewer gunfights.<br /><br />That's the charm of Cotabato City, a sort of "Old Wild West" ambience but with up-to-date weapons. Stayed at a hotel with a security guard who when I arrived was slumped in a chair, fast asleep, with an M16 assault rifle across his knees. Like a modern day Clint Eastwood.<br /><br />THey also have guards with assault rifles outside conveniance stores.<br /><br />In Cotabato City you'd definitely be ill-advised to accost random people asking about condoms or shouting "Woopha!!!" There's a seven out of ten chance that any random person has a gun so best not to shout "Woopha!!!" at them in case they're feeling jumpy. <br /><br />Still, would be fun.<br /><br />To get from Cotabato City to the most boring town in Europe involved 4 airports. <br /><br />All I can say is that Cotabato City Airport is cute. Not as cute as Tindouf, but better guarded. There was security at Tindouf airport, but less than you'd see at a Cotabato City conveniance store.<br /><br />Manila's "Ninoy Aquino International Airport" is what you'd expect of the main international airport of a country whose economy is based on exporting human labour. Lots of queues. Its also got a big new international terminal that's only used by local flights because they never finished building it because the funds kept dissapearing into the bank accounts of the former President & her family. And beware of people outside the international terminal wearing official badges & uniforms. If you make eye contact with them they'll try & extort money off you,<br /><br />Dubai Airport is a giant shopping mall — no surprise there. You can smoke but only in a particular coffee shop where they won't let you in unless you spent 35 dirhams. The upside of Dubai Airport is you can by pseudoephidrine-based pharmaceuticals for a mere 12 dirhams. Not like in fucking Australia where pseudoephidrine-based pharmaceuticals have almost dissapeared because some dickheaded moral panic spreading politicians decided that because if you have kilos of pseudoephidrine it can be used to make speed or ice, pharmaceuticals containing a few miligrams must be restricted in case some speed freak buys every fucking packet of Sudafed in the country or something. They could have just made a law saying you're not allowed to by more than 100,000 packets at one time. Fucking Australian politicians are moralistic fucking dickheads. <br /><br />Frankfurt Airport can be summed up in two words: racial profiling. SeEuropean looking riously, if you're white you could pull out a bag of smack and shoot up in the customs hall & the customs & security people wouldn't notice because they're too busy hassling all the darker skinned people or noticing that a respectable-looking grandmother is wearing a headscarfe.Conehead the Barbituratenoreply@blogger.com